Who Will Play Rex Reed in the Lifetime Biopic? Nobody.

Lisa Waugh

Apparently Rex Reed is a little behind the times. The 74-year old certainly didn’t do his storied career any favors when he eschewed his job at reviewing Identity Thief and instead attacked Melissa McCarthy’s size. Or maybe he shored up what many have always thought about Reed… catty queen.

McCarthy is funny as hell and not going anywhere except between the sky marshall’s legs

McCarthy has been a powerhouse since her appearance in Bridesmaids. She’s been open about her weight and the message she wants to send young girls, including her daughters, about their self worth and self-image.

I for one love anyone who is funny and talented. I don’t care if they’re drop-dead gorgeous, Jill Average, straight, gay, large or small. Funny is a gift and the packaging doesn’t matter.

McCarthy has been more than gracious about her chances and success and she makes me cry when I watch Bridesmaids. I can’t catch my breath.

Reed’s random attack seems very out of place. Ironic, in an age where coming out is seen as a celebration and embracing differences is the going thing, one would think that Reed would be more than happy to swim in this new stream far from the closet and drug-induced weight loss back in the day. Instead, he chooses to stand on the bank and throw rocks.

When I read Reed’s mean little tirade, I thought, “Oh my, Miss Reed’s got the old-timers.” A friend said, “Is Rex still pissed because he didn’t make it as an actor?” He came up in the industry amongst women who didn’t fit the traditional bombshell mold and were deadly funny: Phyllis Diller, Elaine May, Carol Burnett, Lily Tomlin, Gilda Radner, Bea Arthur…

Is Reed simply hung up on McCarthy’s weight? It seems not. He calls her a “gimmick,” says she’s “obnoxious” and defends calling her “tractor-sized” and “hippo” by feigning some invisible friend’s health being compromised by obesity. Please, girl, please. Stop pearl clutching and admit that you’re just a big ole bitch. Melissa McCarthy is no more a “gimmick” than John Goodman or Phillip Seymour Hoffman.

Bless your heart

Money isn’t the value of a person’s worth but as a top earner in her field and with three new movies on the horizon, McCarthy isn’t going anywhere but up. And judging by Identity Thief’s opening box office of $36.6 million, Reed’s very job was to talk about the film and the performances of McCarthy and Bateman.

If he didn’t like the film based on his tenants of filmmaking (becuase, you know he’s made tons of films, right?), he should of simply panned it and left it at that. Frankly, and this is not a dig, I didn’t realize that Reed was still writing and I don’t know that many people who listen to movie critics so much. Still, the man is entitled to his opinion even if it’s a childish and mean-spirited one.

I’m glad that the industry has come out to defend McCarthy. Bridesmaids director Paul Feig tweeted: “For his catty and school bully name-calling of the supremely talented Melissa McCarthy, I cordially invite Mr. Rex Reed to go f— himself.”

Modern Family’s Eric Stonestreet: “Turns out, Rex Reed didn’t die sad and alone 10 years ago. Nope. He’s alive and starving for attention, so lets give him some.”

My advice to Rex is to call up George Takei and let him give you some lessons on aging with grace and tolerance. Plus, I’m waiting for the Poehler/Fey treatment of this debacle because you know they’re going to call up McCarthy and make it awesome.