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Forced to Watch Old Guy Vs. Young Guy

Drunk LA Girl Okay so last night some friends of mine invited me over for some pizza and beer and I was really excited to just hang out and pretend my week never happened when I walked in and saw that they had the stupid vice presidential debates on. You have got to be fucking kidding me! I’m gonna […]

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Dear Goldie

Dear Goldie, I wanted to take this opportunity to thank you, publicly, for your tireless commitment, your grace in navigating the beast that is L.A traffic and your stoic performance in the dodgiest of situations. My decision to partner with you was questioned by all – how truly reliable could you be given your age […]

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Not in MY Bar

Drunk LA Girl So it was a long day yesterday and everyone I knew was going to see Bieber after work except ME, ’cause I couldn’t get tickets ’cause my stupid boss won’t let me use the company internet for anything but work. So I invited some coworkers to get drunk at Casey’s downtown and […]

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Jonnie Stapleton Is Not Afraid

Lisa Waugh It’s no easy thing for me to go and see my friend’s stuff. By stuff I mean, their band, their improv show, their stand-up, their live quilting competition (I don’t know if that’s a thing but it should be). I’ve had a fairly mixed experience. What do you say when your friend is […]

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Learn Improv From the Nicest Chick Ever

Have you ever wanted to get up on a stage and perform improv comedy but were scared crapless? Well, this is your lucky day because Jayne Entwistle is going to show you how. You don’t have to be a pro or have any previous experience in any kind of performance to join her class. Jayne is […]

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Blanche Tackles Ball Scabs

Relationship “Expert” Blanche Légère Sorry kids, I’ve been unable to answer your letters because I’ve been passed out on my bathroom floor for over a week now. I can’t get any real sleep, not in my very own bedroom because I have new neighbors. New neighbors who have been keeping me up all hours of the […]

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Russell Peters: Red, White and Brown

Lisa Waugh Recently, I went to see a friend’s stand-up show here in Los Angeles. He was pretty awesome. I have a review of that show coming up this week. What stuck out in my mind, and the mind of the audience, was the really crappy material the host of the show laid out. She […]

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Ribness

Ian Kragen For the past several months, I have been on a mission to teach myself, through trial and error, how to barbecue pork and beef ribs. Now, going into this I knew straight off there were going to be a few obstacles. Cost being the main one. Smart & Final sells Famer John pork […]

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GrilledCheezGuy’s Food Truck Dream

Going from lil cart boy on the streets to full size GrilledCheezGuy megafoodietron truck that could serve winning, all the cheesy time.   A semi-long time ago, in a kitchen far, far, away. A grilled cheese master was born and forever changed the course of history for the Grilled Cheese Sandwich and America. After mastering […]

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“Is it healthy to hate my ex-boyfriend after all this time?”

ScallywagMagazine.com’s Relationship Columnist Blanche Légère answers your questions… I must say that the mailbag was quite heavy this morning when I fished around for letters to fulfill today’s column. I was quite touched at how much many of you insist on sending me pictures of your taints. I do have a fondness for Barse but […]

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A Box of Franzia, Me and You…

Blanche Légère answers your relationship questions Hello, dear friends. I’m not a psychotherapist and I’m sure as hell not qualified to give advice, but I’ve been to a lot of therapy sessions… some of them even voluntarily. So go ahead and email me your questions at scallywagmagazine@gmail.com or simply click on our Contact Us page […]

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Make Your Own Greenlight

A lot of people ask you for money to make their horrible short film about an international zombie spy ring (wait, that’s actually not a bad idea) or their banjo jazz fusion album (Bela Fleck already did it, now knock it off) but sometimes… people are awesome and talented at what they do. Here are […]

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Going Out for a Pack of Smokes

ScallywagMagazine.com’s Relationship Columnist Blanche Légère I’ve been thinking about starting up smoking again. I know it can kill me, but probably not as fast as my marriage, or my next attempt at suicide. Who knows, “Going out for a pack of smokes” might actually save my life. I’m either in the middle of, or possibly […]

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Why Political Party Conventions Are the Worst Concerts Ever

Rene Parker  Political party conventions are the worst rock concerts ever. Since they’re televised you get to see just how lame the events are. They say it’s cooler for the people attending in person but then that’s more like a party and I’ve never enjoyed watching a party on television. Face it, MTV Spring Break […]

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The Future of Music on the Jersey Shore

Chris Homsley I have a couple of friends who produce a show called the Promo Only Artist Showcase held during the DJ Expo. This is a showcase for up and coming DJs and dance music acts, and sometimes to launch an artist’s comeback. It’s held in Atlantic City at the House of Blues venue in […]

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Pole Dancing Class: The Anti-Charm School

Jenny Denton Loud music… scratch that, loud bad music. Like Britney Spears, Christina, Beyonce and all of those other girls who refuse to have names that are easy to spell without using Google. Luckily, there was no Nickelback or I wouldn’t be writing this… Twenty girls share the floor with me, most of whom are […]

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